Frightfest: Oct. 26, 2017

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October 26: Ash vs. Evil Dead: The Killer of Killers. Rating: 5/5. Comment: This episode was definitely a turning-point for the characters — Amanda comes to recognize the truth. Ash is back and better than ever.

Peace and love.

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Frightfest: Oct. 25, 2017

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October 25: Ash vs. Evil Dead: The Host. Rating: 4/5. Comment: This episode was much better than the last. It gave a sense of closure to the demon story arc and wrapped up the loose end with Pablo’s uncle.

Peace and love.

Frightfest: Oct. 24, 2017

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October 24: Ash vs. Evil Dead: Brujo. Rating: 3/5. Comment: The Fornellis agree there wasn’t something quite right with this episode — it was off somehow, but we can’t put our fingers on it. It was still enjoyable, but the pacing was odd and there wasn’t enough information given during the acid trip.

Peace and love.

Frightfest: Oct. 23, 2017

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October 23: The Witch. Rating: 1/5. Comment: Could I have possibly hated this more? Maybe I’m not “cultured” enough to get the hype. The accents were hard to understand so we kept the subtitles on. From what I gather, there was an evil witch. She killed a baby. There were some evil twins. They talked to a goat, who was apparently really a pirate-looking devil in disguise. They claimed an innocent teenage girl was a witch because her sicko brother kept staring at her chest. This was like a ripoff of The Crucible meets Young Goodman Brown. What a frickin train wreck. Oh, the things I would give to have that hour and a half back.

Peace and love.

Frightfest: Oct. 20, 2017

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October 20: Gerald’s Game. Rating: 5/5. Comment: This movie is based on one of my favorite Stephen King books. Josh is skeptical that he actually wrote it, but I digress. The actors were spectacular. The story-line is terrifying. The movie actually managed to smoothly and slyly slip in references to his other novels. I loved it. I even liked the ending, though I’m almost certain that’s different from the book.

Peace and love.

Frightfest: Oct. 18, 2017

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October 18: Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter. Rating: 3/5. Comment: As far as realism goes, this movie is the end of it in the series. As far as gruesome, excruciating, nauseating deaths go, this movie is the piece de resistance (for 80’s slasher films). There were many, many times throughout the film when I asked, “Seriously? Who would do that in real life?” For example, some twenty-something twins were biking down a forest path with no bras on, and then went skinny-dipping with a group of strangers they’d just met, culminating in anonymous sex with said strangers. It’s fairly obvious why fate, in the form of machete-wielding Jason, took them out. Then, a teenage girl picks up a hitchhiker who’s carrying a bunch of weapons because he plans on “camping” and “hunting,” and brings him home to hang out in her little brother’s room. Finally, aforementioned little brother decides to put on makeup and shave his head in a gutsy attempt to hypnotize the mass murderer he assumes is Jason after reading an old newspaper article about a child who had drowned in the lake, rather than using the ax stuck in his wall to save his sister.

Peace and love.

Frightfest: Oct. 17, 2017

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October 17: Death Sentence. Rating: 2/5. Comment: Kevin Bacon, you pick the worst movies to star in. Maybe let me pick your scripts from now on. Fairly believable emotional reactions are sprinkled about like teeny, tiny sprinkles — like, the glitter looking ones, not even the long bar ones — on the over-sized sugar cookie that is this movie. (In my metaphor, the sugar cookie is this piece of crap movie, since no one likes sugar cookies. No one. Don’t lie. I won’t believe you. Similarly, there is no way any one could possibly enjoy watching this flick, but the sprinkles at least make it seem an infinitesimal amount more palatable.) Ludicrously unrealistic and genuinely inexplicable behaviors abound. Plot holes run rampant, desperately flailing their arms about! John Goodman’s performance was the only other saving grace, but I sort of feel like he was just being himself in this “thriller/action” movie. Terrible.

Peace and love.